11 Ways to Become Your Best Self


Do you ever get these moments when you meet someone and you quietly tell yourself that you want to be like this person when you grow up? Maybe not exactly like this person because everyone has flaws, but there is something about their intelligence, energy, presence, confidence, or (insert desirable quality here) that just awakens both your mind and heart alike. And people and inspiration like this tells you that you’re capable of becoming your best self too.

The universe won’t give you anything you can’t become.

Inspiration like this can come from a variety of places. Movies, TV shows, comic heroes, real life, work, Instagram -- people who you see yourself as can come from anywhere around you. You’re always creating your best self and it’s never done.

Personal growth topics has been popular on this blog lately. I thought I’ll share with you eleven ways to become your best self.

Let go of resentment and forgive.

The first step to becoming your best self is to let go of negative feelings -- or at least be mindful that they’re popping up each day. We’re all human so negative feelings will always be part of us. Sometimes we get triggered by bad customer service or our family, but at the end of the day, you want to forgive them.

Many people think that when you’re forgiving people, you’re doing them a favor. You’re probably like, “Why should I do it for them when they’re the one who has wronged me?”

But here’s the thing girl. You’re not doing it for them. You’re doing it for YOU. You can only become your best self when you let go of resentment (and any negative feelings when they pop up) and forgive.

Practice mindfulness.

Do you ever feel like you have one thought and before you know it, it spirals out of control?

If you’re someone who overthinks constantly, mindfulness is the practice for you.

One of the most relieving and beautiful things about mindfulness is that your thoughts are just thoughts and nothing more than your thoughts. Your thoughts don’t determine who you are or your reality. It doesn’t even determine your actions if you don’t act on it.

When you’re practicing mindfulness, you can simply let your thoughts come and go. I like to tell myself, “These thoughts are just thoughts. These are nothing more than thoughts. These are illusions. They’re not reality. They’re not me.” It might sound weird or awkward the first few times you do it, but with repetition, it begins to stick.

To become your best self, you have to let go of some thoughts -- or at least, understand that they’re just strangers who come and go. You don’t have to give ‘em meaning or act on it.

Related: 5 Tips to Becoming More Mindful Everyday

Cultivate gratitude.

Gratitude is proven to raise your vibration and energy. If you want to become your best self, you want to feel your best self. And to feel your best self and vibrate higher, you want to say, “thank you for….”

Just imagine this… if you already became your best self… you would be filled with gratitude right? You’ll be thanking the universe for everything that you have. But even if you’re not quite there yet, you want to start thanking the universe for everything so you feel and “vibrate” the energy of your best self.

I know this last part seems like you’re faking it till you make it. Quite honestly, I’m still learning that step and it’s a muscle to be built.

Always tune into the good side when a struggle pops up.

Everyone will always have some sort of struggle no matter how great their life is. Like Mark Mason says, it’s just a matter of what kind of struggle you find worth fighting for. (I recommend the book “The Subtle Art of Not Giving an F” by Mark Mason if you want to understand this better.)

Since there will always be struggles at every point in our lives, why not tune into the positive side of a struggle? Everything, every situation in life is a perspective. The same thing can happen to two different people, but it’s up to us to assign it meaning. For example, let’s say Iris and Henry both lost their jobs one day.

Iris sees this as a blessing in disguise because she was tired of working at that company anyway so she decided to take this unlimited vacation time to travel the world.

Henry, on the other hand, becomes depressed because he feels his life is over.

You see… the same situation happened to Iris and Henry, but their responses are way different.

Know your dream lifestyle.

A dream lifestyle doesn’t have to be you owning a mansion and a yacht. It just needs to be your ideal of a lifestyle that feels good to you. In your dream lifestyle, what do you want? What will you have? The people, relationships, and friends you’ll have?

These questions can sound intimidating if you’re still far away from your dream lifestyle. Don’t try to overthink it. What comes to mind naturally with ease?

A while back, I took a look back at my life, particularly all the things I wanted when I was in college. Sure enough, a lot of them has manifested. But I noticed that while some of the things I wanted manifested, I also manifested some things that I didn’t want. I realized I was being too vague about some of my wants. Or other times, it turned out I didn’t want that thing enough to begin with.

This is why you want to be honest about the dream life that you want and be specific about it to a certain extent. In fact, many of the points will spring off of this point.

Build excellent habits.

Having the dream is one thing, but getting there is another thing. Building good habits is the bridge between your dream and the final reality. Anything worth having will require some level of commitment and daily consistency.

I’m not going to go too detailed into habit building because I’ve already written any entire article on it.

Related: 5 Habit Stacking Tips to Build a Life You Love

List out all the qualities of a person you love.

One of the reasons I love watching movies and TV is finding a female heroine I aspire to be. This was one of the better (and more productive) habits that I had as a child. A year or two ago, I went back to re-watch a very old TV show that I really enjoyed in eighth grade. The leading female character had all the qualities I wanted in a person: determined, creatively strategic, resilient, and she always seemed to have this psychic ability to know what other people are thinking (I think this modern-day intuition), etc.

I use to watch the show every few months to build up excitement, momentum so that my desires would manifest sooner (Okay, I didn’t use the technical term “manifest” back then, but that was my intention.) Surprisingly enough, two years ago when I went back to watch the show, I’ve already became a very close version of the female lead.

Part of me was really shocked that my manifestations worked; the other part of me was like, “How can I manifest more and do so more intentionally?” Also, no character comes without flaws so I ended up manifesting some of her flaws too -- which was kind of funny. It should be all fun though as we are constantly evolving human beings.

It really helps to list out all the positive qualities of this person you really love, whether it’s a real life person you admire (like Oprah) or a fictional character from a book or movie. You really want to get deep into why this person inspires you so that you can use the inspiration to become your best self.

Find your strengths.

To become your best self, you want to know your strengths. Having desirable qualities are great, but it’s your strengths that will help you contribute to your family, your work, your career, your projects, your friendships and relationships. Your qualities will help you identify yourself, but your strengths will help you serve the people closest to you.

I do believe that your strengths and best qualities will be related one way or another. I’ve written an entire article on how to find your strengths. If you’re completely brand new to knowing your strengths, I recommend the Strengths Finder quiz and book. I’m sure you have a simple idea of what you regularly get praised for by your family, friends, and bosses.

Related: How to Find Your Strengths

Be creative everyday.

The surefire way to live an interesting life is to be creative everyday, even with the small things. One small thing after another will eventually snowball into something big! You don’t have to be inventing the next Facebook or Google, you just need to do the same thing slightly different and more effective than you did yesterday.

For example, I’ve been practicing meditation all month. One of my goals for June is to meditate at least 10 minutes each day. A few months ago, if I saw anything about meditation I would be totally skeptical, “Does this even work?”

But over the past few days, I’ve been meditating beyond 10 minutes and hitting 20-30 minutes per day. Yesterday morning, I even turned on my meditation app while brushing my teeth and doing my skincare routine.

Who says meditation requires you to sit on a meditation pillow the traditional way?

Creativity is a muscle. When you begin to use it on the small things… it can eventually surprise you in big ways! You only become your best self when you stop doing things the traditional way and start doing it creatively.

Related: How to Tap Into Your Creativity

Follow your intuition to make uniquely YOU decisions.

Your intuition is that kind inner voice inside you that’s leading you to your desires so you make the best decisions you can ever make. Your intuition is usually contrasted with your ego that tries to protect you when you make a necessary, but scary decision.

But to become your best self, you can’t always be listening to your ego or the so-called advice that society is telling you. I’m not saying that there isn’t truth to what society says, but society usually serves a one-size fits all plan to all of us.

Begin listening to your intuition and let it be your inner guide to the daily decisions you make. Only your intuition (or gut feeling) knows what’s best for you and what you truly want.

I started tuning into my intuition around 2009-2011, when I was still in college. When I entered the working world, I realized that I went against my intuition again because there were many work-related decisions that weren’t within my control.

That’s when I started picking up blogging as a creative outlet again. I’m happy to say that I follow my intuition everyday with Sea of Bliss.

Related: How to Listen to Your Intuition (Intuition for Beginners)

Surround yourself with the best 5 people who inspire you.

You probably heard of the phrase, “you can’t do it alone.” To become your best self, surround yourself with five people who inspire you. These five people can be people who are online influencers, family and friends, accountability buddies, or an inspirational fictional character, etc.

It helps to have a mix of each of these that serve different purposes.

It’s difficult to grow and become your best self when you’re not having some incoming streams of inspiration. For example, James Wedmore and Kathrin Zenkina are two entrepreneurs whose content inspire me every week.

Becoming your best self doesn’t happen overnight. We are all stronger in one area than another. Choose an area where you’ll like to take to the next level and an area where you’ll like to improve upon to become your best self. Let me know what you choose in the comments below! Until next time, Judy.

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